Im sure youre hearing the term Emotional Intelligence. Its being talked about a lot these days. For most people theres an immediate click. We recognize it as the missing piece!

Its like that cartoon of the girl saying, Oh, I knew I forgot something. My career! Well, in this case, we become aware that someone, somewhere along the line forgot to tell us how to be smart about our emotions. At least in words we could understand!

But then again are you or are you not smart about your emotions? You see we dont even know how to assess how we are with our emotions. It simply hasnt been talked about it ways that makes sense and would allow us to use the information we receive.

If someone says, Youre too reactive, what does that mean? In relation to what or to whom? And arent they usually talking more about themselves? Usually they mean Youre more reactive than I am or Youre more reactive than Id like you to be. They may be the kind of person who could have a firecracker go off next to them and not react, but what does that mean in relation to their ability to function and relate? Not much!

And then the next day youll have a pounding headache, or have been up all night with the baby, and fail to respond immediately to a comment someone makes and theyll say, Why dont you respond? You just sit there.

One standard would certainly be how well things are going for you at work and at home, because our EQ is more important to our happiness, success and health than our IQ.

POSITIVE FEEDBACK LOOP

The people Ive worked with in Emotional Intelligence take to it immediately. There are immediate applications to their life they try, and the results are positive, so theres an excellent and immediate feedback loop that keeps you motivated and improving.

One of the best things about it is that you learn the tools, and then the applications are all around you. No matter what situation youre in, or what circumstance, increasing your Emotional Intelligence skills will help. Youll become more aware of whats going on around you the things you couldnt quit grasp before. Youll also become far more knowledgeable about whats going on with other people, and isnt that always the most difficult thing to figure out?

COMPETENCY EXAMPLE

Heres is an example. One of the Emotional Intelligence competencies is emotional expression. Its important to understand that 90% or more of any persons emotional expression takes place nonverbally. That means ta da you need to increase your skills in being able to notice and INTERPRET nonverbal behavior. This means the expression on the persons face, how they sit, how they walk, their tone of voice, their silences, and other important cues as to how theyre feeling.

Why is this important? They may be telling you how they think, but how they feel is whats going to influence what action they take, whether they buy the product, whether they hire you, or whether they marry you.

AT-WORK APPLICATION

If you are charged with motivating others, you must be able to communicate well, and you must be able to read their nonverbal communication. Motivation is a feelings thing, not a thinking thing. If you can connect with whats important to the person youre dealing with, or connect everyone to an idea or mission they can feel strongly about, you will have your motivation.

At the same time, you need to be able to read the level of the buy in from the other person. They may say theyre going to do the project, call the person, raise the annual fund 100%, buy your product, or give you a promotion some day, but, since 90% of most communication is nonverbal wouldnt it be better if you have studied Emotional Intelligence?

AT-HOME APPLICATION

Our work is important to us, but our home is where we live. If your relationships at home arent going well, nothing at work will matter. And the sad thing is, most of the time if you arent get along at one place, you arent at the other. Why? Because we dont leave ourselves behind when we leave for work in the morning.

This is not to say the applications are the same because an intimate relationship is different from a work relationship, but only in some areas. Increasing your intimacy and parenting skills is part of emotional intelligence. Couples who communicate better have better marriages, and one of the best things you can give your children is knowledge of Emotional Intelligence and good modeling of emotionally intelligent behavior.

MULTICULTURAL APPLICATION

Walk in any office today, or any family gathering, and you are going to have people from different cultures, yes? This means you can no longer predict how people are going to behave. In one culture, you show up on the hour. In another culture, you show up 15 minutes late. In still another, its an hour late. These cultural differences affect our daily lives more all the time, and strong Emotional Intelligence skills are required in order to manage them.

BEING IN THE KNOW

As more people learn about Emotional Intelligence, its going to be important that you stay in the loop. Get in early. Its the emotionally intelligent thing to do!

HOW TO LEARN EQ?

One of the most important things to understand about Emotional Intelligence is that, unlike some other life skills, it cant be learned ONLY be reading. There are Internet courses you can take, and books and ebooks you can read, but you need to work with someone such as a certified Emotional Intelligence coach who can guide the learning process.

Its difficult to change something you cant see clearly and we dont see ourselves as others see us!

Yes, time usually brings improvements in the area of Emotional Intelligence, but you can greatly accelerate the learning curve, with great benefits to your life.

HOW TO BEGIN?

Taking an EQ assessment is a logical starting point - http://tinyurl.com/z94t . Dont be surprised to see that youre better at some competencies than others. The ones you are lower in can be raised, because EQ can be learned!

Susan Dunn, MA, The EQ Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . I offer coaching, distance learning, and ebooks around emotional intelligence for your continued personal and professional development. Transition, career and relationship coaching. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for FREE ezine.

The discoveries of normal galaxies, strings of galaxies and heavy elements in the far distant universe [1-7] suggest that these space objects have to be older than what the big bang universe can allow for their creation. In this way the big bang universe enters its current age crisis [8], which will require some new assumptions to mend the edifice of this complex theory. The basic principle of parsimony, known as Occam's razor, says not to do with more, e.g. with more assumptions, what can be done with less [9]. The advance of science shows that nature prefers simplicity and the simple explanations are hard to find because nature complicates in our perceptions according to the theory of interaction [10]. The big bang theory offered a simpler explanation for the cosmic microwave background radiation as a thermal radiation left after the big bang and thus sent the rival steady-state theory of the universe into oblivion. The theory of interaction offers a simpler explanation for the puzzling clumpy structure of the universe and the structure of the cosmic microwave background [10].

The accessible universe is like a cloud of galaxies that moves around its source like an atmospheric cloud that drifts around the center of its planet [10]. Our Galaxy is like a huge atom whose nucleus is orbited by stars. Similarly the electrons move around the nucleus of their atom. The solar system also resembles an atom with the Sun taking the role of nucleus and planets rotating around it. The universe is like a hyper huge atom whose nucleus, the center of Eugene Savov's "firework universe" cast away the nuclei of the smaller atomic like structures [10]. The created huge nuclei did the same and so on - observed universe made of multiscale nuclei was created. So the "firework universe" had a sudden lumpy beginning, which is consistent with the big bang rocking discoveries of normal galaxies at the outskirts of the observable universe and also accounts for the mysterious dark matter as the smaller chunks of "basic matter" move around the cores of their sources. The universe is made of 3D-spiral swirls that create smaller ones in their structure rather than from seen as elementary particles, born from mysterious matter-antimatter asymmetry in even more uncertain big bang universe beginning [10]. We see only the inner parts of the 3D-spiral swirls of basic matter because they move faster and so become denser and visible to us [10].

The just born "firework universe" looked as made of bright blue stars - the smaller ones moving around the larger ones [10]. The cooling of this universe created the cosmic microwave background radiation and its structure. The smaller stars cooled and created the planets and their planetary like moons. The extinction of the expansion of the 3D-spiral swirls, seen as stars and planets leads to mighty 3D-spiral contraction of the "basic matter" that creates supernova events [10]. The atoms are like very small stars. Eugene Savov's theory of interaction shows that we are not made of stardust as the big bang theory claims. We are made of atomic size stars [10].

There is universal similarity in nature arising from its discovered 3D-spiral underlying structure. The universe is made of contracting and expanding, vibrating 3D-spiral swirls of basic matter that depending on their size create what we see as galaxies, stars, planets, planetary like moons, atoms, electrons, elementary particles, light, space and time. The 3D-spiral contractions and expansions of the largest swirl, the source of the universe, make it always finite in one revealed complete picture of creation. Every body and similarly the universe as a whole come from and later end on their discovered finite source. For example a form of life comes from and latter ends on the Earth's surface. The all-building interaction is governed by scale independent laws that arise from the discovered 3D-spiral fractal like fabric of reality [10].

Nature has a 3D-spiral code, which is in each of its bits like the DNA double spiral is in each cell of life [10]. The properties of the discovered all-building 3D-spiral structure of nature are described in the theory of interaction [10]. This structure shows that clumpiness is a basic trait of existence, which can be observed since the first moments of the universe beginning. The fundamental nature of lumpiness is well in agreement with the puzzling discoveries of galaxies and heavy elements at the fringes of the observable universe [10]. The Hubble Ultra Deep Field and other similar findings [4, 11] and "the swirling flow of gas hovering just a few miles from the surface" of what is considered to be a neutron star [12] are just some new confirmations of the "firework universe". The 3D-spiral nucleus of the star remains after annihilation of its atomic shell during supernova explosion. This nucleus has to be very massive and dense, made of predominantly inward 3D-spiral swirl of basic matter [10]. Thus it will display properties currently explained as a neutron star.

The theory of interaction shows how the current understanding of nature, the classical and quantum physics, can be simply derived from a new basic framework, considered at the scales of observation [10]. Thus the theory of interaction expands our understanding of nature to the discovered frames of existence. The proper understanding of the universe unfolding is key to the understanding of life, mind, the cause of cancer and the other health problems. The real understanding of nature will essentially improve the quality of life.

References

1. http://www.astronomy.com/Content/Dynamic/Articles/000/000/001/185qtocj.asp
2. http://www.astronomy.com/content/dynamic/articles/000/000/001/256sitgq.asp
3. http://www.astronomy.com/Content/Dynamic/Articles/000/000/000/785llgvk.asp
4. http://hubble.gsfc.nasa.gov/survey/hubbledev/newscenter/newsdesk/archive/releases/2004/07/text/index.html
5. http://au.arxiv.org/abs/astro-ph/0311279
6. http://www.gsfc.nasa.gov/topstory/2004/0107filament.html
7. http://www.astronomy.com/Content/Dynamic/Articles/000/000/000/935khpwu.asp
8. Maddox, J., Big bang not yet dead but in decline. - Nature, Vol.377, 99, 1995.
9. http://pespmc1.vub.ac.be/OCCAMRAZ.html
10. Savov, E., Theory of Interaction the Simplest Explanation of Everything, Geones Books, 2002.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/9549103455/ref=ed_oe_p/102-0036578-9140143?v=glance&s=books&st=*
11. http://www.eso.org/outreach/press-rel/pr-2004/pr-04-04.html
12. http://www.gsfc.nasa.gov/topstory/2004/0220stardisk.html

Physicist, Author of Theory of Interaction